A Different Kind Of Driveway Moment

Minnesota Public Radio, aka MPR, uses that term a lot, particularly during pledge drives when reminding us how valuable their programming is to us. It refers to our hearing something so worthwhile to us that we sit in our driveways until it finishes, rather than leaving the car. I've had a few of those myself.

This is a different kind of driveway moment, and while I personally haven't had one of these, I fully understand the need.

I have several women I spend time emailing back and forth with. More than one of them are or have been stuck in a situation where they are a primary caregiver for somebody they love who needs nearly round-the-clock care. Their own needs come last, of course, affording them precious few for themselves, for private time, refresh and renew time, vent time.  Add in covid's further isolation, even the worry for another loved one battling its serious effects, and life becomes overwhelming.

This particular excerpt comes from an email conversation with a friend who's in both situations right now, caregiver for one, worried frantic about another. She found her own driveway moment yesterday.

"______ is still on all the machines, but responding, tired, is now in a bed tilted at 45 degrees & can sit up?.....couldn't tell from text if he has yet talked or is "awake" at times, or still sedated.....so we don't ask....just accept what we can find out and grateful to be informed.

But after shopping Costco, had another little errand to get stuff at Walmart without _____ because he hampers my routine when uses the stroller and he was tired from the earlier Costco thing. ANYHOW, when I was in the car by myself......I just screamed out loud and swore and banged on the steering wheel, kept screaming & crying & swearing & cussing everyone I think is evil and corrupt and liars & shouting at _______ to hear me and get well, you have lots to do ..........I never did that before.....it felt good."       

My response was simply to let her know how glad I was that she could find that moment for herself and encourage her to find more. Sometimes it's all one can do, and hope for a moment it's enough.