Remember I said this shoulder is healing differently than the first one? Pain is still the biggest part. The long term nerve block wasn't as effective and still isn't. Second time there was the familiar body dysphoria like the first time but little pain control. These weeks later my body recognizes itself and its location, but a long-term ache has set in and seems to resist alteration. I was used to Tylenol settling in to ease pain on shoulder #1 within half an hour of taking a pill, not to mention lasting for hours. Now it's like I have to wait hours and find I'm still waiting until I realize it was gone for a bit but I moved and it's back.
I left the hospital with a smaller amount of Oxy than post shoulder #1. Since I hadn't really needed that much oxy previously I had no complaints. So the temptation, when my shoulder aches for hours at a time, is to take another oxy in hopes of stopping the pain. It does sort of work. But it also means I can't drive if needed. I had a good chat with my surgeon last week, my first post-op exam in his office. We discussed a lot of things, including my need to be available as a (legal) driver coming up. I had Googled the question, trying to find out how long Oxy stays in the system, in order to see how long I needed to wait to be legal after taking one before driving, since the shoulder itself would not be expected to stop me by the time I was needed to drive Steve around after his new hip - and presumably his own doses of some strong narcotic painkiller for a while. So no driving for him then while he recuperates.
Google simply gave me a scold! Obviously if I had to ask, then I had a problem with narcotics and needed to try treatment or addiction therapy. WTF! All I wanted was a window for being legal, just in case I was needed for driving - as fully expected when Steve couldn't. I figure I can monitor my muscle strength and work around the disability of the hour. I have for years, never letting various muscle strains or even a broken hand keep me from doing my job driving. Tennis elbow? Adjust this way. Bad knees? Arrange for driving long distances instead of hiking heavy boxes every couple of blocks in a major city. I made sure the company valued me and thus gave me every opportunity to (reliably) do the job as needed. They didn't need to hear about a broken hand, I just disguised it with a carpal tunnel support and carried on. I was dependable, the bills got paid.
But all I got from Google was a bad assumption and an insult. What I got from the surgeon was understanding of the family needs now, and a time requirement of 24 hours between taking an oxy if needed on a bad day and getting behind the wheel. It makes the difference between ordering groceries to be delivered - an extra fee - and driving 24 miles round trip to haul them home, up the stairs, and into the house. Basically it's a financial decision, while we're still paying off the new furnace. Both of us should be able to make that kind of choice for ourselves, both of us dealing with surgeries to lessen daily pain and increase mobility as we heal. Steve will be getting his PT in our home. I'll be heading over to the local doc's office, just like for the other shoulder, about 3 miles each way, driving of course, but not starting my PT till July. Muscles will be adjusting - should all go as planned - and the second shoulder learning to work almost as well minus one of its 5 rotator cuff muscles just like the first shoulder did.
Right now I'm not as optimistic for #2 as I was for #1, but it's still early days. I'm only at the very beginning of the window various surgeons allow for not staying in the sling 24/7. For my surgery some allow it after 2 weeks, others go up to 6. I do know he won't order PT for me until after the 4th of July, which should be a good time to know what both Steve's needs/abilities and mine will be post his hip replacement so I can schedule mine properly. He can still get PT at home, while I'll be driving in and back for mine, and we'll both know more about other plans, like just getting in the car for things like visiting family, or heading to his fishing hole, or hauling the camera to Crex in hopes of that next great photo, since these days it's only shooting the new iris blooms in one of my garden beds. Soon I'll be going for the asiatic lilies down on the south end of our home, since they have multiplied way past even my highest hopes from last year and already need more weeding than I can give despite growing so thickly that even the rabbits don't seem to have a chance for a meal from them. Where last year a bulb produced a single stalk with two or three buds, and only if left alone, now each has grown to several stems with as many as 8 or 10 buds swelling on their tops. Even weeds are being somewhat controlled by their shade - Yahooo!
I still hope to get out to Crex, Steve to go fishing again this season - the independence means a lot to both of us. It's nothing like addiction keeping us examining our pain levels on a daily or even hourly basis. It's balancing right now against hopes for the next day/month/season. It's how much we choose to put up with at any given time, or day, or month. Every so often the shoulder eases enough that it's almost a surprise when it starts in again that it hasn't been constant all this time. I'm hoping the time comes when the pain recurring is what the surprise is: what, you're still here? That's how the first one has been for a while now, reminding me that I'm hauling around something heavier than it's supposed to be used to, like a full gallon of milk. Mostly it vanishes when overuse stops. I expect those same milestones for #2, even while discovering I'm actually thinking it should be catching up to shoulder #1 weeks ahead of time, especially since I'm spoiled by the independence I've gotten used to by such simple things as the planned for change in seasonal wardrobe making dressing much easier this time, jumping over my expectations until I bump into reality. Oh well, learning curves. But having one arm that can actually hang the shower head up again is fantastic independence! Deodorant on both sides is a planned goal. (I can hear you laughing out there!!!)
I have iris plants on order, arriving in the mail these days, no driving required, and easily planted by one hand in a well prepared bed. Meanwhile I've been enjoying shooting the daily and even hourly changes in the circle garden where the iris have been blooming their hearts out. One daylily has poked up a stem with two buds, no clue yet what color. Therein lies a small problem. The daylilies will be crowding out the iris, which means by mid to late summer there will be lots of daylilies to dig out and give away. (No, I'm not charging: inquiries considered.) Judgment was solely by color first, then location second. I've promised my regular PT lady one each of small purple (grapette) and tall purple (Nosferatu) daylilies as a thank you for working with me over the months, both pre- and post- surgery. We fill the hard working repetitious therapy times with gardening talk, among other things. She will get the first two plants. Then as others show their colors (and I know there are at least two other varieties in there I simply do not like as much,) I'll be marking and digging those out to give away, first to friends, and second to other staff in the doc' office who were so interested in seeds from my tall balloon flowers. I can easily remove a likely couple dozen daylillies, individually root-bagged in plastic store bags, of which we have bunches from those times we don't bring our own bags shopping. If I get those while blooming, the potential recipients can see what they're getting and know how hardy those are. Then I can relocate iris in that bed, still have three seasons of flowers, and give the best loved iris room to spread. By then I hope to have two working shoulders again!
How will I know how to spread the iris around, you ask? First, I've been taking regular photos, both of the area as a whole as blooms progress, and individual blossom to get the details. I know that won't be enough, especially as the daylilies try to take over and iris bloom turn to a puddle of mush. So I came up with a plan: mark each one. It wasn't enough to label one blue and another purple. First the blues come in a short and small dark blue, two tall pale blues slightly different in shades, and a short stem but large flower with white standards and dark blue falls. That's just four blues in all, and I already dug out two of the first little ones for the second iris garden. I know I planted ten or so of just that kind last summer. OK, then, how about purple ones? Are we talking burgundy purple, or deep violet purple? The burgundy comes with a rich blue in the middle of the falls and white/orange beards. Another similar one has no blue in the falls but a very deep burgundy, and is hiding orange somewhere behind some of the standards, besides having short beards. The deep violet come with spectacular orange beards... or none visible, and standing side-by-side are hard to tell apart for about three days. Then one of the pale blue ones decided to get so pale it turned almost pure white the next day.
See my challenge? That doesn't even count the ones new last year which haven't bloomed yet, just made leaves so I can at least tell what species they are, as in iris instead of daylilies. I may or may not recall all of what I planted. For sure I can't remember exactly where. Whatever blooms will only last a short while... much like my memory. I need better.
I opted for buying a box of wood tongue depressors - really cheap! - and writing my version of descriptions of each blossom for each flowering stem. Since we've moved recently, there are still a couple remaining rolls of clear packing tape in the house. I went high quality in those. We have sharpies, supposedly indelible. I figured write on the wood, cover it with tape to waterproof it (lots of folds in the tape), and add a loop of tape to go around the flowering stalk it described. Eventually what remains will be a woody stalk with a tag taped to it. That's the plan anyway. They can be moved into spots daylilies are taken out from. Late July or mid August would be pretty perfect timing for both plants. There will still be unidentified iris which didn't bloom this year, including a "Pagan Pink" and a "Grand Canyon Sunset" somewhere. I wrote down other names last summer but have no clue where they landed, and the plants were no help, so definitely a two-year project at best.
If you think this seems a great solution.... I'm waiting to see how summer goes and how tags survive. But the first issue was implementation in the first place. The ground is uneven, and every year my balance gets worse, exacerbated by having fallen a few times without being able to get up without help. No injuries, as such, but I've gotten very leery of this lumpy yard. Add a crowded garden with reluctance to step on what's growing in there. It's not possible to kneel on the outer ring and reach to the center, or at least without kneecaps any more. There are stepping stones into the center in one direction, but I don't trust them... yet. They need to bear weight through a full season so supporting soil adjusts.
Then a solution arrived. Her name is Tammy, a friend of family and rapidly becoming as family herself. She easily found places to step into the garden, and wrapped the tape holding the tags around the appropriate stems, one at a time. Her timing was exquisite, the day before evening showers and a next morning storm. Earliest blossoms or damaged ones have curled into small lightbulb shaped balls, but the tags still declare their original colors. If new plants bloom in the next weeks it can be repeated as needed. As for the new plants ordered for the former rhubarb bed, I already have a chart in process, with variety names, on my laptop ready for printing once done, presuming all orders arrive, alive. I count one as "highly unlikely" to even show up since later clues pointed to a scam and photoshopped impossible colors attached to a plethora of alleged varieties, much a I'd love them to be real. Sighhh....
As an additional bonus, I just realized that Tylenol has been doing a lovely job while I've been writing this. Who needs Oxy when there's a garden to redesign? Unfortunately the Tylenol is still fairly short lived though the supply is sufficient. We found that out recently. The hard way.
Steve has been having computer issues. We think it started with an attempted hacking, and his security system shut him down. That was months ago. We took it to a local shop, which cleared out the crap and reset his programming so he could use his laptop again. The problem recently repeated, stopping him from looking at his photos, playing a favorite online game which he enjoys even more because of a friendly rivalry with an extended family member many miles away, or even using his own funds (though none disappeared.) With the reset he lost all his previous game scores and the two were no longer competing for top score. He was close to working his way back up until his laptop shut him out from everything except his e-books again. Some days he couldn't even access those. Some days he could read this blog but not see photos. We returned to the local computer fixer and the only staffer there that day was... let's just settle for a total prick, and leave it there. Steve's daughter came over and cleared everything off his laptop so he could reset and start over... except the starting over part didn't go well. Through me he contacted Microsoft to get his basic software back, and even though this was a recent purchase they didn't recognize him as a customer so that went nowhere. Aaarrrggghhhh!
This was the start of a lot of driving again, for me. So no oxy regardless of how my recovery was going. There was a trip to Walmart for Rx updates after he saw his doc. It's been his computer doing the grocery orders and paying the one monthly fee to get all delivered, so we were back to in-store shopping, an activity unfriendly to both of us. I hadn't gotten my replacement credit card yet so I couldn't order even for pickup. Steve put his laptop in a bag and took it along to Walmart where he'd purchased it. While he waited for a new Rx to be filled he went back to electronics and - miracle of miracles - found a fellow named Josh in electronics who knew everything his computer needed to get it up and working again, as soon as Steve was back home to put passwords back in. Steve was so impressed he contacted store management to sing the employee's praises! (We're rooting for Josh to get a raise.)
Meanwhile this was my turn not to just drive, but pull a cart around the store one-handed, find people to help reach things for me on high shelves (thank you all!), load everything in the car, drive back home once Steve had finished, and haul bags up stairs, into the house, up onto counters, into freezer and fridge.... Let's just acknowledge the day as a royal pain for me, shall we? Steve at least found a charged scooter/cart.
I might have considered opening that bottle of oxy and popping a pill. It was tempting... if I didn't know I had to drive the next day again. Steve got most of his computer functions back again, so long as he remembered his logins and passwords. Now I know I can't keep up with all mine, especially with old ones I just might need again. I also use "clues" with some of them so you have to know me to have a clue what it might be, and some times even I have issues. I was on Linked In for a while before deciding it had nothing to offer and only recommendations to beg from me. I tried after a couple years to get back in because somebody asked me to. Nothing I think I ever used as a password worked. That settled that. Eventually I located it, and realized I'd felt so pushed to get on the site despite no real interest, I'd used"armtwister" as a password. Pretty telling, right? Use it if you like it. I won't be back there.
But Steve really needed to get back into his credit union to manage his money, pay bills, keep track of his balances. He did all that online. But he lost his information letting him in. We love our Credit Union, and appreciate their safeguards for our finances. In order to get him back into his account, he needed to show up in person with various IDs, sit down with a staff person in their discrete little office, and reinvent the login wheel for his account. This time not only did Steve write it all down, but did what I occasionally do with other things as well: take a photo of it! BTW I saw the photo: it's too blurry for me to read. We'll see how it goes for him in a few months, eh?
This involved a two hour drive into the metro and back, where Steve absolutely hates to go. We have to rely on me to both tolerate the congested cranky traffic and navigate the roads. This was the day after hauling shopping goodies all around, plus a short morning bout of planting some iris tubers which had arrived the day before. A light soak overnight, rain expected the next two days, and very shallow holes in recently turned soil easily made and covered with one good arm. No oxy needed for the planting, of course. But that was the second longest drive I've made since the first shoulder had healed, still no oxy within miles. (Insert cuss words here. Your choice.) Double Tylenol once home.
Did I mention there was also the need for a large load of laundry? I'd been putting it off since just before surgery and needed to be somewhat presentable in public at least. The dryer is stacked over the washer, and I've developed a method for throwing clothes up into it involving more twisting from the waist and relying on inertia than rotating shoulders. Even so....
Yep, oxy would have been nice. I doubled up late that day on a couple more Tylenol doses instead, carefully counting amounts over each day. Eventually I took the sling - the replacement from the hospital one which is easier on the body and mind both for comfort and independence - and set it on the floor on top of my socks so I could get some sleep last night. I have proved to myself now I can get in/out of it on my own. I can also mostly just hold my arm in the position the sling does for me. With the humidity this summer any rubbing against my skin is a huge irritant, so that new bit of freedom is a bonus. I make sure now to start my mornings with two Tylenol instead of just one these days, while I wait for things to settle down again. Mornings are an activity bomb. Steve is going back to online ordering groceries delivered to inside the front door, saving on some driving, but next week is his surgery where I'm the driver. No maybes, no but-what-ifs, I'm the driver. The last two days have been grueling, so if I wanted to be tempted, it's there. But the last few pills are still in the bottle in a location I'm not sharing with anybody, and more iris are in the mail as I write this, but still easily dug like yesterday's pair in the same well-prepared patch of good topsoil. I even have the forethought to have prepared a chart this time as to what has been planted, what will be planted, and where in that plot. Not just species and varietal names, but colors. I'm taking it more seriously this year. However much my shoulder whines.
This was this morning, also before the likely suppertime repeat storm expected. Hail isn't kind. It's nice to have a camera to prove what was fleeting glory. You may note in both shots some of the tongue depressors used to label varieties while they were still identifiable. These shots remind me of part of what I'm working for.
These plastic tags from yesterday's planting remind me of why I keep working for improvement. In case you can't read the labels, this variety is "Painted Woman", two stacked blossoms shown per tag. I hope for better photos than on fading plastic next year... or the following one.
Oh, by the way, all this blogging happens to support my arm perfectly enough that I barely notice it until time to close the laptop and prevent it from crashing into the end table where it sleeps and recharges. I'm probably good till lunchtime, also known as "mail is here" time. A pair of shoes, the keys to the mail center, grab the camera, and I can see if the peony bush survived the night. I hadn't gotten a photo this year yet. It just fully opened these last couple days when I couldn't be bothered, and it's hiding behind the shed. Sighhhhh....
Ask me tomorrow... maybe.
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