You Can't Fix It

 You can’t fix it. Truly. I get where you’re coming from, a caring place, wanting to help, thinking something in your many years of experience will fit the bill. It just won’t. It’s not yours to fix. It really isn’t mine, either, or at least not more than I have already, but now it’s a waiting game. Yes, it’s frustrating. Everything is off balance. Life and dreams are on hold. I’m getting downright cranky. But we all just have to be patient, and that’s hard. So how about just changing the topic?

Maybe you saw the tee shirt. Steve and I thought it was funny when we first saw it, enough to buy one for each of us. There’s a big bull bison on it, black on white background. He’s saying, “You can’t fix stupid. I can. It’ll hurt.”

You know he’s right. Think of all the stupid people in the national parks who think bison are tame like milking cows. They either try to get nice and close for that selfie, or even send junior in to get close, because wouldn’t that be a photo, eh? They never stop to think, much less to recall how often it doesn’t end well.

This isn’t that kind of a situation. It’s not about stupidity, or lack of information, or needing new advice, or even needing emotional support. It’s about an unexpected legal situation. Advice has been given from one with experience and knowledge of the law in this specific situation. Paperwork has been filed. A clock is ticking. Assistance has been given to one who needs it but probably won’t heed it. It’s time to step back, let the clock tick away, and then swoop in and cut all the ties before moving on, making progress.

But people who care keep asking how it’s going, keep offering advice as if nobody had thought of those things long ago. It’s beginning to sound like there is fault involved, or withholding of resources, or stupidity, or all of the above. Do you even realize that doesn't help? Or worse, that it hurts?

How come nobody can just say, “Gee, that’s tough. It must be difficult to wait through it. Let me know if there’s a way I can help, but just know I’m here if you need something”? Because everybody seems to need to step in and fix it. And you can’t. I can’t. Steve can’t. The law takes its time before we can pounce, and pounce we will, when and if it comes to that. Because we’re not patient either, even though we are forced to be. There is a plan. There are people to implement the plan. There are resources to deal with it as soon as the clock runs out.

Now can we please just change the topic?