Eye Opener

Literally... and figuratively as well. What is it with these guys? Or am I painting with too broad a brush, considering I'm selecting two out of the universe of these guys?

Today was my get-new-glasses eye exam. I have my own unique way of prepping for one of these. I don't wear glasses for hours ahead of the exam. I want my eyes to be  examined in as near a possible to their resting state. I discovered years ago that if I had been reading in the car while waiting for my next run to come along, and reading lasted over half an hour or so, when I refocused my eyes on the road I'd see double. Not everything, but double power lines stood out against a blue sky. If they changed for that, they might change from any wearing of glasses for a period of time before the test. I so seldom am perfectly satisfied with my next pair of glasses. Since I can see better driving without them right now, there seemed no down side to the idea.

All the technical stuff, checking the "new" lens where the cataract grew, looking for possible macular degeneration, effects of pre-diabetes, all that stuff had already been checked out by my eye surgeon before we left Arizona. But he's a little pricey, so I tend to go to a chain store to get my prescription for glasses checked before getting new glasses. Big savings! Turns out I still got charged $93. Just for the simple exam. Used to be under $50.

I need new glasses. Not the frames. They're perfect. Titanium, purple, flattering to my face, and fashionable from my grandmotherly point of view. But lately I'd been frustrated while trying to read road and street signs. Even watching TV was clearer without the glasses. It was time. A little research pushed the idea that I might consider switching back to glass rather than polycarbonate lenses. Glass, after all, is what is used in precision optics like camera lenses. I arrived at my appointment with questions.

The first one wasn't what I'd planned to ask. The vision center requires mask wearing. Not a problem, I keep a supply hanging from the turn signal arm in the car, handy for any place requiring them when I'm out and about. But the optometrist ( right word?) wore his under his nose. So what I blurted out was whether he knew it didn't do him any good unless it covered his nose? He rather firmly replied it didn't make any difference. Masks didn't prevent any body from getting covid, and only people who watched CNN or MSNBC didn't know that. There was absolutely no scientific proof otherwise. None.

Well, I immediately pegged him as a FOX watcher. Since I'm fully vaccinated I really didn't worry for myself and he could wear or not wear his mask any which way he chose and it wouldn't affect me. Nonetheless, my second question was to mildly inquire whether he'd gotten his vaccinations then? This time he got a bit huffy. He considered his vaccination status as a private personal health issue and he wasn't about to share it with anybody! I took that as a "No." Everybody I know is happy to talk about where they were in the process and which vaccine was used, along with reciting the ease or struggles they had with getting their shots. But again, I didn't figure it affected me, so we got down to the exam.

Somewhat surprisingly my eye prescription hadn't changed ... in 5 years! Other than the cataract, of course. That's where my records with this store went back to. This was when I asked about glass vs. polycarbonate lenses. He took a close look at my current glasses and informed me the nonreflective coating (optional) on the glasses was flaking away, distorting my view through them. He wasn't sure if real glass would react the same way with that coating, but glass was pretty rare in his business these days so it was probably a moot point. Anyway, I could just order polycarbonate without the coating. I'd likely be as happy if not more so with those lenses.

The discussion had distracted him from the bifocal exam. Or in my case, trifocal. Every time he offered me a choice between two lens corrections, saying that I likely couldn't tell the difference, I found a distinct difference. Not sure what each set was about, but one was always quite clear and one not in each pair today. This was novel to me as well. I've usually had a hard time distinguishing between those pairs.

After discussing the other things in my eye history which had already been examined thoroughly and making notes in my chart, we finished up amicably and he sent me off to the other part of the store to order my new lenses. More surprises lay waiting. I asked again about the possibility of glass lenses, and she had to check. The only way those are available these days is with "Transitions" lenses, the kind which darken/lighten depending on inside/outside conditions. Those  never worked for me. Before I'd bought them, nobody had ever bothered to inform me that car windows block the UV rays which trigger the change. I just wasted my money on them since I spent my days in a car for 29 years. (That's why the left eye cataract.) Still, I was curious about the pricing, now that I was retired and spending actual time outdoors. Another check, then I was quoted a price three times the cost of polycarbonate lenses. That decision was easy!

She walked away with my current glasses, put them in a machine in the back alcove, then returned them to me. No measuring where on the lenses the bi-and tri- focals should line up. No keeping the glasses to put the new lenses in. I was surprised. I had an older pair at home, still good enough, which I'd packed for such a contingency. The only reason I didn't have them along was I left finding them till there was no time for an extended search to figure out where I'd packed them, once we discovered it wasn't in the glove box as I'd thought. Just as well then. Still, I asked why I got these back, and she explained the machine had done all the measuring, the new lenses would be cut to specifications, and in about a week they'd pop the old ones out and put the new ones in.

On my way out the door my mind returned to wondering just what it was with optometrists and their "science" opinions. Of course, I admit my universe of two was this guy, and Rand Paul. This guy at least had real credentials, not resorting to making up a way to credential himself like Rand Paul had done. Still....