It seems it's impossible to get rid of Direct TV when you get rid of Direct TV.
I first called them a couple weeks ago, in order to find out whether we still had our 2-year contractual obligation with them, or it had expired. Dish had a better offer, and has worked with us in the past. Once finding out that, indeed, we had no more contractual obligations with Direct TV, I called Dish and asked for their installer to start us with them.
As soon as Dish was set up and working, I cancelled Direct. Or at least I hoped I had. All their phone contacts were at least one language away from English, and some of the accents are hard to decipher. Even when you can, communication is still an issue. Including truth.
Making the cancellation order was a battle, due in part to the above and in part to a voicemail system which insists you have their specific wording for their machine. How do I know their jargon? Once finally connecting to a human, she insisted I give them a reason why the disconnect, along with other questions leading directly to a blatant effort to persuade me to change my mind. I refused to answer beyond our choosing a different company, and I think she got a bit huffy. Perhaps not, just pushy. There is obviously a script to follow. Hard to read minds. Before that call ended I asked how did we send their equipment back to them?
Well, that was an answer for another person, higher up the chain. After repeating much of the previous call with this new person, including their push for us to remain, I was finally told that we would be sent out an email telling us what to do.
No email came. But a bill did, for next month. The overlap was so close and the mail so slow I decided to ignore the bill, but kept it, just in case.
I called back, inquiring again just how did we send their equipment back? After dodging their opportunity to give us a sales pitch - after all, the Dish system was already up and running - I was told by somebody I mistakenly assumed was being helpful and cutting through all the crap that I just needed to take it all to Fedex, along with my account number and Fedex would box it up and ship it back. Period.
Really? Just that simple? So why did the other person have no idea what to tell me? At least now that last (faux?) bill would be of some use, since there would be need of that magic account number.
Christmas came and went, the weekend and a couple more days passed, and I decided it was errands time again, perfect for sending that stuff back. But had she said "Fedex" or "UPS"? I decided to call them, Fedex first, rather than just haul the stuff to either/both places. Here's where it really got interesting. Fedex informed me my information was in error. Yes, they did work for Direct TV, but I would need it boxed and have a tracking number in order for them to do anything with it. Not the account number? Nope, tracking.
Back to calling Direct TV, now a week and a half after the call to disconnect. By now I didn't trust that the bill could be ignored, or that they had even processed the disconnect. No dawdling, as the funds are directly withdrawn from my bank tomorrow. Meaning midnight tonight. Plus the bank is in an earlier time zone. Chop chop.
Before when calling Direct TV, their voicemail system recognized my phone number, inquired whether this number was connected with the account I was calling about, and did I want my billing balance? It still had problems following my needs from that point, but it was a start. Not this time. (Was this a sign I'd been taken out of the system?)
The first issue was just as their voicemail system was starting their inquiry, I happened to belch. (Hey, on the Steve scale, merely a 2. A 5 is tops. Really hard to do. So, no biggie.) The voicemail system tried unsuccessfully to translate that into a request. Failing to do so, it repeated what it had just asked. But not recognizing my phone number, the options given for what I might want were different from previous calls. They came in lists of 5 items, plus a "something else" option at the end. After three of those sets of options, I was finally directed to another ESL human.
Hmmm, could I verify my billing address? You bet. How about my account number? Yep, I had that too. Was there perhaps another phone number with the account? Absolutely, and I gave it to her. Then the why-did-I-cancel routine along with the attempt of a can-we-change-your-mind bit. Once I set my boundaries for the call, she paused about 5 seconds before becoming useful. Pouting? I found reason to ask, in retrospect. Then yes, after taking another full minute to go over our account records, she verified we did indeed cancel on the day I'd specified to her. Yes, that bill really did have to be paid, as it covered the time previous to the cancellation, and carried forward to January 16th. Apparently my cancellation call missed their date by 5 days.
Passive aggressive seems to be in their playbook. She suggested I could call my bank and have them refuse payment on the bill. But I got smart about it, tempting as nonpayment was, and asked her the ramifications of doing that. Well, we'd be turned over to a collection agency and reported to the credit bureaus.
Nasty! Now I wished I remembered her name. Of course, I'm never sure whether they give real first names or not. I've heard stories about phone banks. But the calls are supposed to be recorded, so perhaps somebody who cares will listen. I gotta wonder, though, will she be corrected or congratulated?
I did also finally get the information from her on how to return the equipment. She'd gotten me annoyed enough by not supplying it, that I admit I had offered to toss it in the garbage if they really didn't want to tell me how to ship it back, though I also suggested we could agree that would be counterproductive. No point in being on the hook to these guys for a cent more than absolutely necessary. She finally informed me that within 3 to 5 days after the 16th, when our business was finally finished according to them, they would ship me out a box for their equipment to be returned in via Fedex.
I'm pretty sure the dog won't be peeing on it while it sits on the living room floor in the meantime. She's been pretty good so far.
I wonder if there's a charge for that.
But I'll be waiting for their box. I truly do not wish to have to call them back a 5th time. They might not be happy about it either.
No comments:
Post a Comment