Bracelets

The first one is white, with a wide space for a typed paper insert, giving his name, address, birthdate, and other information the hospital deems important.

The second is orange, marked in large letters "No Known Allergies".

The third is yellow, warning that falls can be an issue.

The fourth one is purple. It simply says DNR. This one was a long time in coming. Even yesterday he was telling the doctor that he wanted all possible measures taken to revive him should his heart fail. The doctor gave me two reasons that was not a good idea for him. First, should his heart fail, he could be deprived of oxygen long enough to cause serious brain damage. Second, any chest compressions would most likely break his ribs at his age. Thus any remaining time gained by CPR would be spent in pain.

We want to keep him as comfortable as possible. That's why he's likely coming home tomorrow. We'll know for sure after the lung specialist examines him again tomorrow. He'll be more comfortable at home. It won't make any difference to his pneumonia, which they have determined to be chronic rather than acute. That's why no fever, no real progress. Still, he'll likely get sent home with antibiotics just in case they can do some good. Being home won't help the fibrosis, or the emphysema, or the infiltrates found on his recent CT scan. And being home won't help his congestive heart failure any more than staying in the hospital would.

Nothing can.

But he can feel better here, more cared for, more comfortable.

He understands he will not be getting better than he is right now. He discussed his funeral, wanting to make sure he'd be cremated, his ashes buried alongside Mom's at Fort Snelling. I said, "Of course." Mom's urn has been waiting in my living room for 20 months now. He doesn't want us to be devastated when he goes, and joked that I didn't need to agree quite so quickly. His sense of humor is still there, along with his gratitude and appreciation.

He wants more help, so he can do less work, need to struggle to breathe less often. I'll be looking into what kinds of things can be done here at home, what kinds of assistance is available and who'll be paying for it. Tomorrow I'll have to ask at the hospital if they believe he qualifies for home hospice care. That would open some doors.

I think we'll leave the purple bracelet on.