Confusions

The Epley maneuver does work wonders for vertigo, when you can do it right. All the turning alnd holding and stuff, that's not the problem. The problem is determining which side is the affected side. They never explain that. When the room spins when you roll over on your left, does that mean the left or right side is the affected one? And when it spins again when you roll back, which side is it then? How about when it spins when you bend forward to pick something off the ground, now which side?

I compromise: I do the maneuver both ways. One has to be right, wouldn't you think? If I'm lucky, this works, meaning, I think, that I picked the correct side last and now everything's back in place. If not, well, I have been known to throw up.

Meclazine helps. In fact, it's so strong, I take only half a pill. This keeps me from sleeping behind the wheel. I don't just take it after throwing up, or seriously wanting to. After vertigo, there is a period where one is hyper-sensitive to one's head position. Not dizzy, just hyper aware. It commands your attention. It reminds you of where you've just been and threatens to take you back there. Meclazine cuts through that and lets you focus on other things, like the color of the light just ahead of you. This is a good thing.


* * * * *

I found another stupid sign yesterday, and trust me, I really wasn't in the mood for it. It was the end of a long day of walking, lots of short runs in long places. In other words, little rest between long walks. Everything from the knees down ached. This is when the last stop of the day just has to go to a patient in a nursing home. Well, to the floor nurse who's the only person authorizes to sign for his meds. And of course it's suppertime. Not only are all the patients out in the halls and wanting something from whomever passes, but the staff are all busy. You can't even find the wrong staffer to point you to where the right staffer is for that signature. I'm already grumpy walking in the door, just thinking about it.

Sure enough, our patient is up on third floor. There on the column between elevators is this sign: "Push up and down buttons to call elevator". Huh? Several possibilities hold. Either it's because the patients are so completely senile that, while they can still read, they don't know how elevators work. Or it's one of those gimmicks that keep the senile folk from escaping to another part of the building. Some places make you punch in the year on a keypad before the elevator works. Maybe here you have to punch both buttons at once. Or maybe it's just another stupid sign.

I try pushing just the up button. The elevator on my right opens its door and two people step out. This doesn't really answer my question: they might have brought it, not my button-push. On third floor, I ask a passing staffer which way the sign is meant. Do you really have to push both buttons? She says, "No." I just can't resist, "Oh, so it really should read 'or' instead of 'and'."

She doesn't get it.

On the way out, passing the front desk, I overhear a conversation between a little old lady in a wheelchair and the sweet young thing behind the desk.
"I need you to put my shoe on."
"I just did,"
"No you didn't, I need my shoe on."
I looked. Her foot is sticking straight out, and sure enough, the shoe is on, one of those black leather-look things with a pair of velcro straps to fasten it.
"Yes, I did."
"No you didn't."
"Yes, I just did. Look at your foot. Your shoe is on it. I just put it there."
"I need you to put my shoe on."

Maybe she's the one who wrote the sign.