Wednesday, June 14, 2017

A Trip To Prison

Those of you who know me well are aware that an extended family member is in prison. Most summers when we hit Minnesota Steve and I go visit for a few hours. It's contact visitation, so we can exchange hugs, talk all we want (provided rules of common civility are observed), play board games.

Last year that changed. I'd just had my knees replaced, and knew they'd set off the metal detector. So I called their main phone number and asked what I needed to do to gain admittance, explaining my new titanium knees. I was blithely informed that I could tell them what the case was, show my scars if necessary, they'd wand me to verify the metal was inside me, and pass me through for the visit.

Boy were they full of bull****! When we arrived, I was denied entrance. I talked myself blue informing them I'd inquired from out of state, and gotten this nothing-needed response. They didn't care, and treated me like either an idiot or criminal. By the end of that discussion, I'm sure they were as happy to be rid of me as I was pissed to be kicked out.

What, I wonder, did they think I was about to do? Cut my knees open and pull out drugs? A file to work through the bars? A shiv? I mean, seriously, guys? There wasn't already enough pain in the replacement process? So I went back to the car, none too amenably, and sat there while Steve had his visit. I told him to take as long as he wanted, as I had my Kindle along, and there were restrooms in the public part of the building. However, I'm sure he hurried through the visit with me in mind.

He drove up alone for his second visit of the season.

Keep in mind that had I been given the correct information, the two necessary pieces of paper were on file in Arizona, and would have fit easily in a pocket of my baggage.

I brought them this year. They photocopied them for future information and returned them to me for any future need. Probably if I need to fly, or pass some metal detector, or whatever. Who can tell? Everybody down in Sun City knows what those two scars mean. We who have them compare notes, much like new mothers compare birth experiences. Apparently others are perfectly capable of finding more nefarious causes for them.

While I still maintain those people are complete idiots, today I enjoyed a couple hours visit in a prison. And even more, appreciated leaving!

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